Helen GA

As promised. The Traveling Karr returns with his views on our trip to
Helen GA...

Greetings Minions,

I have been again traveling with the writer. This time to an
interesting little place in GA. A small town by the name of Helen.
Now allow me to shed some light on this little town. You see Helen
was a dying town with about a 90% population of Germans. They decided
to clean up the town a bit and all got together and set it up with a
German theme... Yes you can go see Germany in Georgia. Who knew?

Anyway for this particular trip we were joined by an interesting
fellow. Russell. Russell has been Maji's best friend since high
school. Her BFF as she has often referred to him. This trip was an
interesting one because Maji took one look at the directions and
declared screw it. For map quest led her on a road that was vastly
inferior. She instead bought a road map of Georgia and studied it for
a few minutes before deciding that the best way to go would be to
simply follow highway seventeen. A very good judgement for it got us
there within' a fairly short amount of time. After driving along what
Russell claimed was the most boring road ever. In her grandmother's
car by the way. Dante the PT Cruiser had a tail light out.

I noticed something along this trip into the mountains of North
Georgia. There was a lot... and I mean A LOT of churches. I also
noticed something else. For ever church we spotted there was a liquor
store. And for every one of those we spotted there was four or five
cow pastures. There are alot of cows in Georgia...

Anyway we finally got to Helen about ten in the morning. Maji and
Russell stopped to eat breakfast at a huddle house. Which by the way
was much nicer and much cleaner than the local one. Though it still
had crappy service. What does this tell us? Clean up crap and give
it a nice new paint job and it still doesn't change the fact that it
started out as poo.

So survived the huddle house experience (Do yourself the favor and
don't eat the eggs) Maji then decided it was time to go shopping.
Five dollars to park in an empty, dirt lot. So did these people buy
the lot and decide to set up this business or did they just claim a
lot and set up shop? I don't know but wouldn't be my first career
choice. Anyway parked the car then hit the street. Alot of
interesting little shops. Alot of interesting places that have since
closed down to.

We walked up one side of the street and stopped at a real-estate
office and picked up some pamphlets in which Maji was rather irritated
because the man behind the counter couldn't seem to understand that
her and Russell were not a couple. So off again, back down the street
for a couple hours. We then hit the road again, to another Real-
Estate office and a building that the next man sent us out to look
at... (Maji gave up in trying to convince this man she and Russell
were not a couple.

Along the way we stopped at a stable because Maji wished to check out
the local horse area. This place was way over charging for boarding
fees by the way. It also wasn't the cleanest place in the world.
Maji declared that no horse of hers was stepping foot in that place
because apparently Angelous is now to good for dirt to be laid upon
his golden hide. Truly Maji. I don't care if you think you're the
boss of me. Get a life.

Though I will admit that the mud, the flies, and the dog poo didn't
exactly add to the lay out of the land...

Anyway from there we drove fifteen miles to see a bridge. You heard
me correctly. Fifteen miles to see one bridge. What kind of bridge
is so special that you drive fifteen miles to see one? Apparently a
covered bridge... It was half a barn over a creek for God's sake! It
was covered in graffiti and could hardly be called a bridge as when
looking down at your feet about half way across you could see the
river below. Not a bridge.

We then packed up and from there pretty much started the long trip home.

Though we can not close this out without explaining what happened upon
getting into Augusta which ended in Maji being banned from yet ANOTHER
establishment in the Augusta area. So what's the list up to now? She
can not go back into Best Buy, Pet's Mart, and now Burger King on
Peach Orchard Road has been added to the list. But for the record the
woman behind the counter did have an attitude and was very stupid.
Though Maji didn't have to actually throw a cheese burger at the girl
to get the point across. When I did that I was told I had an anger
issue. I do not have anger issues I might add. It is everyone else
who has a stupid issue.

That aside we did have a very nice time. We learned some things...
Figured some things out. Even got to meet a few interesting people.
(Guy from the magic shop? I still don't know how in the hell you made
that quarter appear. But when I find out I will rule you!)

Karr

Well that's it folks. We're going to Savannah this weekend so stay
tunes. Interesting things on the way!